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CONTACT Feature: Caring for parents with dementia
March 11, 2011
| CARING FOR PARENTS WITH DEMENTIA! Over coffee and cake Dolores shared with me what she expected mid-life to look like: she and her husband Bill of 40 years enjoying a carefree, blissful life together. Then she shared with me her reality. Both of Dolores’ parents were diagnosed with dementia and she has spent 10 exhausting years as a caregiver. “I was working full-time but in order to provide care for my parents I would drive hundreds of kilometers a week between Abbotsford and Burnaby, spending up to five hours a day helping to manage their finances, meals, coordinating help and doctors visits,” explained Dolores. “Bill and I made a lot of sacrifices in order to provide that kind of care.” Part of the reality for Dolores was accepting the fact that her personal interactions with two dear parents would also change. “My mother was kind, loving, and sweet as a biscuit,” Dolores said. “I couldn’t believe it when one time she became so agitated in her early onset Alzheimer confusion that she threw a can of soup at me.” Imagine the years of demands and the emotional roller coaster of guilt, resentment, anger, hate and love, sometimes all at the same time. Some days Dolores would cry the entire drive from Burnaby to Abbotsford, wondering how much longer she could continue to do this without getting sick. She ended up taking early retirement because she could no longer continue working and taking care of her parents. “The Alzheimer Society of B.C. saved my life through their caregiver support groups, education programs, Dementia Helpline and resource centres,” Dolores said. “I just wish the Society had more funds to do even more for caregivers like me.” Would you help caregivers on the dementia journey like Dolores? By making a $30 monthly gift to the Alzheimer Society of B.C. you are helping to ensure there is care for caregivers across the province. In a recent memory loss test, Dolores’ mom was asked to “write a simple sentence”. She wrote “I love Dolores.” Warmly with much thanks for your response, David Walker Director of Resource Development Alzheimer Society of B.C. |
| Photo credit: The Abbotsford News |
